Sex Before Marriage

Customer: “Wow, that’s a beautiful car”.

Dealer: “It certainly is! You should give it a test drive to see how it runs, then you will see the real beauty”.

Try it before you buy it is not only how we treat our cars, clothes or our favorite snacks, this is also how we treat sex. Culture has taught us that sex before marriage is a must. I mean, how can we truly know unless we try it right? Or, maybe sex is worth waiting for. Maybe our bodies are meant for something more than just sex. I mean, how can we truly know unless we sustain from it? With two different thoughts we can ask the question, is sex before marriage okay to do?

Culture has taught us that casual sex with our boyfriend or girlfriend and sometimes random people is completely okay. For many sex is a way that you show commitment or show your love. We hear it talked about in songs or movies that if I give my man or woman what they want they will stick around or love me more. In some ways this may be true, but in most sex can complicate things.

God created sex to be a beautiful thing between a husband and his wife. Somehow, we have misconstrued this way of thinking and made it a free for all. In Matthew 19:5-6 it says,

“And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

In this text I would like to focus on the words “one flesh” When and man and women become married they are now one. This means they are connected together spiritually, physically, emotionally and sexually. To put this into context, when you have sex outside of marriage (with your boyfriend/girlfriend) you have now become “One” with that person. So now the very connection that you are supposed to experience with your husband or wife you have now experienced with a random person or a boyfriend/girlfriend that you may break up with.

As you can see the idea of sex before marriage runs much deeper than just doing something for pleasure or just to try and see what it would be like. However, it goes much deeper than that. You remember John or Mary the person you slept with? Well even after you broke up, that connection of oneness that you have still exist. This is called a soul tie. A soul tie is the reason why when you break up with a person you had sex with you feel as if something is missing or you have a longing for them. To better help us understand those connections we will look at 1 Corinthians 6:15-16:

“Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.”

While this scripture is pretty aggressive, I believe it helps paint the picture of what sex before marriage is equivalent to. I don’t think any of us want to be connected to anyone who isn’t our spouse. Those connections don’t just run between you and that other person. You also are connected with all the previous people they were connected to. So now you are in a web of connections that will potentially affect your future connections.

Sex is a beautiful thing, but it is most enjoyable when it is with your spouse. Waiting can be frustrating and very hard, but I promise you it will be well worth it. 1 Corinthians 6:19 reminds us that our bodies are a temple. Don’t allow culture or those around you to tempt you to stumble. If you have already had sex it’s never too late for you. Today you can make a change that will shape your future. If you pray this prayer, I believe God will step in and change your life:

Father God I come to you today asking for forgiveness of all sins I may have committed known and unknown. God, I ask that you come into my life and save me. I ask that you cleanse me of all unrighteousness and make me whole. I ask that you break any soul ties or connections to people that mean me no good. Lord I ask that you anoint me with your holy spirit so that I can walk every day in your word. It is in Jesus name I pray AMEN.

Welcome to the family of Faith!